Laid Aside: Why?

[By Charles Spurgeon. Excerpted from an article in The Sword and Trowel, May 1876. I read a quote from this article in the September 23 sermon – Coty]

Mysterious are the visitations of sickness. When the Lord is using a man for his glory it is singular that he should all of a sudden smite him down, and suspend his usefulness. It must be right, but the reason for it does not lie near the surface. The sinner whose every act pollutes the society in which he moves is frequently permitted year after year to spend an unabating vigor in infecting all who approach him. No sickness removes him even for an hour from his deadly ministry; he is always at his post, energetic in his mission of destruction. How is it that a heart eager for the welfare of men and the glory of God should find itself hampered by a sickly frame, and checked in its utmost usefulness by attacks of painful disease?

We may ask the question if we do so without murmuring, but who shall answer it for us? When the advance of a body of soldiers is stopped by a galling fire which scatters painful wounds on all sides, we understand that this is but one of the natural incidents of war; but if a commander should check his troops in mid-battle, and proceed with his own hand to render some of his most zealous warriors incapable of service, should we not be at a loss to conceive his motives? Happily for us our happiness does not depend upon our understanding the providence of God: we are able to believe where we are not able to explain, and we are content to leave a thousand mysteries unsolved rather than tolerate a single doubt as to the wisdom and goodness of our heavenly Father. The painful malady which puts the Christian minister hors de combat [“out of action due to injury”] when he is most needed in the conflict is a kind messenger from the God of love, and is to be entertained as such: this we know, but how it can be so we cannot precisely tell. Let us consider awhile. Is it not good for us to be nonplussed, and puzzled, and so forced to exercise faith? Would it be well for us to have all things so ordered that we ourselves could see the reason for every dispensation?

Could the scheme of divine love be indeed supremely, infinitely, wise if we could measure it with our short line of reason? Should we not ourselves remain as foolish and conceited as spoiled and petted children, if all things were arranged according to our judgment of what would be fit and proper?

Ah, it is well to be cast out of our depth, and made to swim in the sweet waters of mighty love! We know that it is supremely blessed to be compelled to cease from self, to surrender both wish and judgment, and to lie passive in the hands of God.

It is of the utmost importance to us to be kept humble. Consciousness of self-importance is a hateful delusion, but one into which we fall as naturally as weeds grow on a dunghill. We cannot be used of the Lord but what we also dream of personal greatness; we think ourselves almost indispensable to the church, pillars of the cause, and foundations of the temple of God.

We are nothings and nobodies, but that we do not think so is very evident, for as soon as we are put on the shelf we begin anxiously to enquire, “How will the work go on without me?” As well might the fly on the coach wheel inquire, “How will the mails be carried without me?” Far better men have been laid in the grave without having brought the Lord’s work to a standstill, and shall we fume and fret because for a little season we must lie upon the bed of languishing? If we were only put on one side when apparently we could be easily spared, there would be no rebuke to our pride, but to weaken our strength in the way at the precise juncture when our presence seems most needed, is the surest way to teach us that we are not necessary to God’s work, and that when we are most useful he can easily do without us. If this be the practical lesson, the rough schooling may be easily endured, for assuredly it is beyond all things desirable that self should be kept low and the Lord alone magnified.

May not our gracious Lord design a double honor when he sends a double set of trials? “Abundant in labors” is a high degree, but “patient in suffering” is not less so. Some believers have excelled in active service, but have scarcely been tried in the other and equally honorable field of submissive endurance; though veterans in work, they have been little better than raw recruits as to patience, and on this account they have been in some respects but half developed in their Christian manhood. May not the Lord have choice designs for some of his servants and intend to perfect them in both forms of Christly imitation? …

A change in the mode of our spiritual exercises may also be highly beneficial, and avert unknown but serious evils. The cumbering engendered by much service, like a growth upon the bark of a fruit tree, might become injurious, and therefore our Father, who is the husbandman, with the rough instruments of pain scrapes away the obnoxious parasite. Great walkers have assured us that they tire soonest upon level ground, but that in scaling the mountains and descending the valleys fresh muscles are brought into play, and the variety of the exertion and change of scene enable them to hold on with less fatigue: pilgrims to heaven can probably confirm this witness. The continuous exercise of a single virtue, called forth by peculiar circumstances, is exceedingly commendable; but if other graces are allowed to lie dormant, the soul may become warped, and the good may be exaggerated till it is tinged with evil. Holy activities are the means of blessing to a large part of our nature, but there are other equally precious portions of our new-born manhood which are unvisited by their influence. …

May not severe discipline fall to the lot of some to qualify them for their office of under-shepherds? We cannot speak with consoling authority to an experience which we have never known. The suffering know those who have themselves suffered, and their smell is as the smell of a field which the Lord hath blessed. The “word to the weary” is not learned except by an ear which has bled while the awl has fastened it to the door-post. “The complete pastor’s” life will be an epitome of the lives of his people, and they will turn to his preaching as men do to David’s Psalms, to see themselves and their sorrows, as in a mirror. Their needs will be the reason for his griefs. As to the Lord himself, perfect equipment for his work came only through suffering; so must it be to those who are called to follow him in binding up the broken-hearted, and loosing the prisoners. Souls still remain in our churches to whose deep and dark experience we shall never be able to minister till we also have been plunged in the abyss where all Jehovah’s waves roll over our heads, If this be the fact – and we are sure it is – then may we heartily welcome anything which will make us fitter channels of blessing. For the elect’s sake it shall be joy to endure all things; to bear part of “that which is behind of the afflictions of Christ in my flesh for his body’s sake, which is the church” shall be bliss to us.

Alas, there may be far more humiliating causes for our bodily afflictions! The Lord may see in us that which grieves him and provokes him to use the rod. … It can never be superfluous to humble ourselves and institute self-examination, for even if we walk in our integrity and can lift up our face without shame in this matter, as to actual sin, yet our shortcomings and omissions must cause us to blush. How much holier we ought to have been, and might have been! How much more prevalently we might have prayed! With how much more of unction we might have preached! Here is endless room for tender confession before the Lord.

Yet it is not good to attribute each sickness and trial to some actual fault, as though we were under the law, or could be punished again for those sins which Jesus bore in his own body on the tree. It would be ungenerous to others if we looked upon the greatest sufferer as necessarily the greatest sinner; everybody knows that it would be unjust and unchristian so to judge concerning our fellow-Christians, and therefore we shall be very unwise if we apply so erroneous a rule to ourselves, and morbidly condemn ourselves when God condemns not. Just now, when anguish fills the heart, and the spirits are bruised with sore pain and travail, it is not the best season for forming a candid judgment of our own condition, or of anything else; let the judging faculty lie by, and let us with tears of loving confession throw ourselves upon our Father’s bosom, and looking up into his face believe that he loves us with all his infinite heart. “Though he slay me yet will I trust in him,” — be this the one unvarying resolve, and may the eternal Spirit work in us a perfect acquiescence in the whole will of God, be that will what it may.

 

To Fear God Rightly

[This devotion is a shortened and edited version of a sermon preached July 24, 2016 from Job 38:1-42:6. These ideas are especially relevant as we have a hurricane bearing down on us today. You can listen to the audio of that 2016 sermon via this link.]

Do you fear God? Should you fear God? If so: How should you fear God? What does a right fear of God look like?

The closing chapters of the book of Job help answer these questions. Recall that Job was a wealthy man who – according to God Himself – was righteous an upright. Furthermore, God tells us Job fears Him (job 1:1). But then in a matter of minutes, Job loses all his possessions and all his children. A short time later he loses his health. And his pain just continues, day after day. Friends arrive and initially are silent, mourning with him. But at long last Job speaks, cursing the day he was born. His friends begin to argue that Job is suffering because of sinfulness. Job knows that is not right – but he wrongly accuses God of being his enemy, tormenting him. He calls on God to give him the opportunity to present his case, to show that God is not right to make him suffer like this.

But in the midst of his anguish, Job does express confidence that God will vindicate him after his death. And he rightly sees that God’s ways are hidden; furthermore, he sees that wisdom requires us to fear God. Nevertheless, he still longs to present his case before God.

Elihu then appears on the scene (Job 32:1). This young man rebukes both Job and his friends. He makes three points:

  • God is not Job’s enemy, but sends affliction for his good. Indeed, God speaks to use through pain.
  • God always does what is just and right.
  • We must be overwhelmed by the greatness of God’s wondrous works.

In Job 38-42, God Himself speaks, picking up and elaborating on Elihu’s third point, while effectively building on Elihu’s first two points.

These chapters show us that while Job knew he was to fear God, and while God commended Job for fearing Him, Job did not yet fear God rightly. Through God’s speaking, however, he comes to see God for who He is – and thus fears Him rightly and trusts Him fully. We too can learn of a right fear of God through this text.

See God for Who He Is – and So Rightly Fear Him

As Elihu concludes his speech in Job 37, a storm is rolling in. Elihu comments, “God thunders wondrously with his voice; he does great things that we cannot comprehend” (Job 37:5).

He then concludes:

The Almighty–we cannot find him; he is great in power; justice and abundant righteousness he will not violate. Therefore men fear him; he does not regard any who are wise in their own conceit.” (Job 37:23-24)

Then beginning in chapter 38, God speaks – to display His great power, His justice, His wisdom, and His righteousness, all of which should prompt a right fear in us.

In Job 38:2-3, God effectively says, “If you’re so wise, Job, if you’re so righteous, if you’re so powerful, then answer a few questions for me.”

Job has desired a mediator, so he can present his case and show that God has unjustly sent all this suffering. He wants God to be judged. But we cannot put God on trial. That’s like a two year old putting his parents on trial. God does not answer to us. We answer to Him. God is the one who rightly asks the questions. And this is what God does for most of chapters 38-41.

God’s purpose in these chapters is to show Himself to Job, so that Job might rightly see Him. We know this in part from Job’s response in 42:5: “I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you.” Seeing God for Who He is enables Job to realize that he is a dependent creature. Like a little child, he must trust, love, and delight in this great God – not put Him on trial.

What does God say to help Job see Him? He tells Job to see Him in His creative acts; then He tells him to see Him in creation itself – both in the heavens, and in the animals.

See God in His Creative Acts: Job 38:4-21

God asks, “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding” (Job 37:4). Echoing Genesis 1, God asks Job questions about separating light from darkness, the waters from the dry land, and day from night. He concludes this section by stating mockingly that Job should know all this, “for you were born then, and the number of your days is great!” (Job 37:21)

The point is that we can’t even begin to comprehend God’s creation – and we’re much too young to have seen it. For we’re part of it! We are His creatures, we are dependent creatures. So how can we stand in judgment over Him?

See God in His Creation: The Heavens Job 38:22-38

God knows how to control snow, wind, rain, lightning, ice, and stars. He understands what they are, where they come from; He uses each for His good and wise purposes. We can do none of that.

See God in His Creation: The Animals Job 38:39-39:30, 40:15-41:34

God speaks much of various animals for Job to look at. With one exception, all the animals mentioned are wild: Lions, ravens, mountain goats, wild donkeys, wild oxen, ostriches, the war horse, the hawk, the eagle, Behemoth, and Leviathan. God asks if Job provides food or homes for these, if he can even see all that they do. He asks if Job can make them serve him  – for they do serve God! He asks if Job can make these animals fast, or wise.

Even the war horse – the one “tame” animal – is not ours by right or even under our complete control. God asks in Job 39:19-25: Did you give the war horse his might? Did you give him his mane? Do you make him leap? The war horse was the most powerful weapon available to armies in Job’s day – but it was not created by humans, and was barely controlled by them.

The last two creatures God mentions are Behemoth and Leviathan. We’re not sure what particular animals God is talking about, but that’s really immaterial. These are powerful creatures, created by Him for His delight. They were not created by us or for us; they are not controllable by us. Indeed, God emphasizes this: “Behold, Behemoth, which I made as I made you” (Job 40:15). Similarly, we have no hope of controlling or subduing Leviathan, a creature without fear (Job 41:33).

So God asks Job questions, pointing out His creative powers, His rights over His creation, His wise governing of creation, and our smallness. What point is God making through these illustrations?

The Point of Creation

God’s point is not, “I’m mighty so do whatever I say!” In the midst of enabling Job to see Him for Who He is, God does emphasize His power – for it is great! Indeed, He makes clear:

“All is Mine to Do with as I Please”

God created everything; He created us. We don’t exist apart from Him. We are dependent creatures, contingent creatures. God’s delight in His creation is evident in this text. All creation, including these creatures man cannot control, is doing what He planned – except the humans in the story. And God intervenes in order to get them in alignment with His purposes.

And what are His purposes?

“I Please to Display My Glory”

Clearly God’s glory is displayed in the heavens and in the animals He has described. But God also speaks of how His glory is displayed among mankind. He does this in part by humbling the proud and bringing down the wicked. Note what God tells Job to do if he can:

Pour out the overflowings of your anger, and look on everyone who is proud and abase him. Look on everyone who is proud and bring him low and tread down the wicked where they stand. Hide them all in the dust together; bind their faces in the world below. Then will I also acknowledge to you that your own right hand can save you. (Job 40:11-14)

God says: The world needs a ruler. Mankind needs a ruler – or the proud, the wicked will dominate, harm, destroy, and thrive. So God is not only saying He is mighty; He is also saying that He is the moral authority in the universe. He is the ruler mankind needs. For He destroys the pride of men – and pride before God is our fundamental sin.

So in this section God destroys Job’s pride – to his good.

But He does more than destroy pride. He also leads His people to delight in Him and in His works.

God doesn’t humble us just to bring us low. He humbles us so we can delight in what is truly the source of joy – Himself! When we are so impressed with ourselves, we can’t delight in our dependence on God; we can’t stare in wonder and joy at the greatness of Who He is and what He has done. Job does finally have such wonder and joy in the end:

“I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you; therefore I despise myself, and repent in dust and ashes.” (Job 42:5-6)

So Job is not simply humiliated. Rather, he sees God and delights in Him, saying, “Wow! Here is majestic joy! Here is overwhelming beauty! Here is overpowering magnificence. I now see You, Lord, for Who You are – why would I rejoice in anything else?”

The Right Fear of God

Look at Job’s responses more fully:

“Behold, I am of small account; what shall I answer you? I lay my hand on my mouth. I have spoken once, and I will not answer; twice, but I will proceed no further.” (Job 40:4-5)

“I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted.’Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?’ Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.” (Job 42:2-3)

Do you see how Job’s fear of God has changed? Previously, he saw God as his enemy, his adversary, harming him. He feared an arbitrary, capricious God. While he knew that was a wrong understanding of God, his inability to understand what God was doing led him to fear what that mysterious God might do next.

But now he sees God for Who He is: In his glory, in his majesty, in his purposes. God is exalting what should be exalted – Himself! God is humbling what should be humbled – proud men! And so this new fear, this right fear, is not the result of Job anticipating harm from God, but rather an overwhelming sense of God’s grandeur combined with a confidence that God, in His mysterious ways, is working for good purposes.

This is what a right fear of God brings about: A humbling of self, and a deep delight and trust in God.

Furthermore, in consequence we fear nothing else. Indeed, this is why the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom. Wisdom is seeing who God is, seeing how He rules world, seeing who we are, and responding rightly. Job now has that wisdom. He has seen God. He has seen Himself. He repents. And He trusts God.

What about you?

Does your suffering seem pointless, harsh, far beyond what you deserve – like Job’s?

  • Do you want to put God on trial?
  • Do you think God needs to explain Himself?
  • Do you think you have a good case against God?
  • Do you question His wisdom, His power, His authority, His love?

God tells you what He told Job: “See Me for Who I am!”

See Him in His revelation in His Word – in Job

See Him as the Creator – and thus as the One who can do what He likes with what is His

See Him as the One who sees all, sustains all, controls all, and delights in all His works

See Him in the heavens, in hurricanes, in the animals

And today see Him most clearly in Jesus Himself – with all authority, all compassion, all power, all humility; see Him risen and reigning, and see Him suffering and dying; see Him overcoming all powers, and see Him washing His disciples feet;  see Him riding on the white horse to conquer, and see Him holding children in His arms.

This majestic, all-powerful God became man, lived in humble circumstances, and died horribly so that you might be reconciled to God, so that you, fearing God, might be embraced by God.

See God for Who He is, and so come to fear God rightly. And having feared God rightly, trust God fully.

When God Seems Distant

When we struggle, when we go through pain and hard times, we often feel as if God has forgotten us. We pray and no one seems to hear. We read the Bible and get nothing out of it. We feel abandoned, deserted.

Those are the feelings reflected in Isaiah 49:14. Zion – a name for Jerusalem, often used in Scripture to represent God’s people – cries out, “The Lord has forsaken me; my Lord has forgotten me!”

But God replies:

“Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are continually before me” (Isaiah 49:15-16).

Think of the most tender human moment – a mother nursing her baby. Consider the love, the care, the devotion, as she feeds this infant from her own body.

Now imagine that mother forgetting her baby is even there. She stands up, drops the child on the floor, notices nothing, and walks away.

Hard to imagine, isn’t it? We think that could never happen.

But God tells us: Even that may possibly happen, but He will never forget His people; He will never abandon them. Indeed, rather than just holding the baby to the breast, God has engraved His people into the palms of His hands. His people are ever before Him; they are part of Him. To abandon them would be to cut off part of Himself.

Thus Scripture assures us: God is for His people, He is with His people, He has reconciled His people to Himself in Christ, they are incorporated into Christ. He will not, He cannot forget His people.

Now, zoom the thought in close, making it personal: If I am in Christ, God’s love for me exceeds the love of a nursing mother for her child. He tenderly cares for me, He guards all my ways, He works all things together for my good and His glory. He will never leave me nor forsake me, but will bring me safely to His heavenly Kingdom.

What joy! What assurance!

But now zoom the thought out once again: If I am in Christ, I am part of His beloved people, part of the Bride of Christ, whom He will present to Himself in splendor, to His great joy, whom He is forming from those of every tribe and tongue and nation, who together are for the praise of His glorious grace. And in the new heavens and new earth, all of God’s people will love Him with all their heart, all their soul, and all their strength – and each will love you, each will be closer to you than your closest friend or family member today. Furthermore, this intimate friendship with God and with one another will never end.

No matter how you may feel, God will not forget you. If you are in Christ, He has great plans for you, together with all of His people. He is at work fulfilling those plans – amidst all the trials, difficulties, challenges, and horrors of this life. In Christ, you are engraved in the palms of His hands. Trust Him – and pray for His Kingdom to come.

Your Way Was Through the Sea

What do you do when the path ahead seems fraught with danger – when there are a zillion ways that all could fall apart, when worries and cares abound? When your eyelids are propped open at night, as you lie in your bed imagining all that could go wrong?

This is the situation of the author of Psalm 77. God seems distant and uncaring; He seems angry, reneging on His promises. Remembering past times of intimacy with God only serves to magnify the sense of alienation the author experiences in the present.

So he asks: Has God’s unfailing love failed? Has He forgotten to be merciful and gracious? Will He never again be kind to me? (Psalm 77:7-9)

But instead of continuing in self-pity, questioning God’s character, in the following verses the psalmist wisely changes course: Instead of focusing on his past subjective experiences of God, he disciplines himself to meditate on the objective revelation of God through history – particularly through the history of His mighty acts on behalf of His people (Psalm 77:10-12).

The psalmist looks first at the big picture: Over the centuries God has proven Himself to be holy and mighty, a Redeemer of His people (Psalm 77:13-15). He then focuses on one specific act – God’s bringing His people through the Red Sea (Psalm 77:16-20). He imagines himself among the Israelites, with the Egyptian army behind them and the impassable waters in front of them. There is no way out. All seems lost. Despite God’s power and might exhibited in the nine plagues, despite the miracle of the death of the firstborn leading Pharaoh to let the people go, now they will all be slaughtered by the army or drowned by the sea.

But then God divides the sea! The waters well up, “a wall to them on their right hand and on their left” (Exodus 14:22). And the people make that long trek across the sea.

Yet as he imagines the event, the psalmist realizes something vitally important – important for him and for all of us facing challenging circumstances – a point we often miss in telling the story of the Exodus: “Your way was through the sea, your path through the great waters” (Psalm 77:19a). God is leading them right into the midst of the sea! They must walk for miles, with the water piled up on both sides. Should that water pour over them, there is not a thing they can do to save themselves. There will be no escape. Is this a deliverance – or the path to their destruction? Clearly God has acted to part the waters – but will He keep the waters parted for the hours it will take them to cross?

Friends, this is characteristic of the way God acts toward His people. The way ahead looks uncertain and frightening. We can imagine thousands of ways all could fall apart, all could go wrong. We pass through the valley of the shadow of death and are tempted to fear all sorts of evil, for we question the power and the goodness of the Shepherd.

When you experience such fear and doubts, follow the example of this psalmist: Remember how God has revealed Himself through the history of His people. Remember that His way is often through the sea; we are to walk right into the midst of the dangers and challenges. Remember that He promises that “through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22). Remember that it is in such circumstances, when we are at our wits’ end, that He is most glorified in saving us. Remember – and then trust the mighty God who never changes, whose unfailing love never fails, who promises that nothing will separate us from the love He has for all of those who are in Christ Jesus.

Silence in Afflictions

[In pain because of God’s discipline for his sin, David prays, “I am mute; I do not open my mouth, for it is you who have done it” (Psalm 39:9). While we will consider this verse in the context of the entire psalm on Sunday, the English Puritan pastor Thomas Brooks wrote an entire book based on David’s statement, The Mute Christian Under the Smarting Rod (1659). Here are some excerpts and the first part of his outline in updated language for your consideration and meditation. You can read the entire book via this link. To distinguish between my words and Brooks’, my paraphrases are in italics – Coty]

Christians, it is mercy, it is rich mercy, that every affliction is not an execution, that every correction is not a damnation.

There is a PRUDENT silence, a HOLY, a GRACIOUS silence; a silence that springs from prudent principles, from holy principles, and from gracious causes and considerations; and this is the silence here meant.

I: What does this silence include?

It includes and takes in these eight things:

First, acknowledging that God is the author of all our afflictions

There is no sickness so little—but God has a finger in it; though it be but the aching of the little finger.

Such as can see the ordering hand of God in all their afflictions, will, with David, lay their hands upon their mouths, when the rod of God is upon their backs, 2 Sam. 16:11, 12. If God’s hand be not seen in the affliction, the heart will do nothing but fret and rage under affliction.

Secondly, acknowledging God’s majesty, sovereignty, might, and authority over us.

A man never comes to humble himself, nor to be silent under the hand of God, until he comes to see the hand of God to be a mighty hand. . . . When men look upon the hand of God as a weak hand, a feeble hand, a low hand, a mean hand—their hearts rise against his hand.

Thirdly, this silence springs from a quiet and calm mind and spirit

Aaron, Eli, and Job. . . saw that it was a Father that put those bitter cups in their hands, and love that laid those heavy crosses upon their shoulders, and grace that put those yokes about their necks; and this caused much quietness and calmness in their spirits.

Some men . . . hide and conceal their grief and trouble; but could you but look into their hearts, you will find all in an uproar, all out of order, all in a flame; and however they may seem to be cold without, yet they are all in a hot burning fever within. Such a feverish fit David was once in, Psalm 39:3. But certainly a holy silence allays all tumults in the mind, and makes a man ‘in patience to possess his own soul.’

Fourthly, this silence springs from acquitting God of all blame or injustice in bringing the affliction on us.

God’s afflictions are always just; he never afflicts but in faithfulness. His will is the rule of justice; and therefore a gracious soul dares not cavil nor question his proceedings. The afflicted soul knows that a righteous God can do nothing but that which is righteous; it knows that God is uncontrollable, and therefore the afflicted man puts his mouth in the dust, and keeps silence before him.

Fifthly, this silence springs from five conclusions about the eventual impact of the afflictions on us.

Five conclusions based on Lamentations 3:27-33

a) The afflictions shall work for their good

Surely these afflictions are but the Lord’s pruning-knives, by which he will bleed my sins, and prune my heart, and make it more fertile and fruitful; they are but the Lord’s potion, by which he will clear me, and rid me of those spiritual diseases and maladies, which are most deadly and dangerous to my soul!

b) Afflictions shall keep them humble and low

c) The rod shall not always lie upon the back of the righteous.

d) God will he have compassion, according to the multitude of his mercies

The life of a Christian is filled up with interchanges of sickness and health, weakness and strength, want and wealth, disgrace and honor, crosses and comforts, miseries and mercies, joys and sorrows, mirth and mourning. All honey would harm us; all wormwood would undo us—a composition of both is the best way in the world to keep our souls in a healthy constitution. It is best and most for the health of the soul that the warm south wind of mercy, and the cold north wind of adversity—do both blow upon it.

e) God’s heart was not in their afflictions, though his hand was.

He takes no delight to afflict his children; it goes against his heart. It is a grief to him to be grievous to them, a pain to him to be punishing of them, a sorrow to him to be striking them.

Sixthly, this silence springs from a conviction from our own conscience to be quiet and still before God

I charge you, O my soul—not to mutter, nor to murmur; I command you, O my soul, to be dumb and silent under the afflicting hand of God.

Peace, O my soul! be still, leave your muttering, leave your murmuring, leave your complaining, leave your chafing, and vexing—and lay your hand upon your mouth, and be silent.

Seventhly, this silence includes a surrendering of ourselves to God while being afflicted.

The silent soul gives himself up to God. The secret language of the soul is this—’Lord, here am I; do with me what you please, write upon me as you please—I give up myself to be at your disposal.’

Eighthly and lastly, this silence comes from a hopeful patience while waiting upon the Lord to work His deliverance.

II: What does this patient silence NOT EXCLUDE

Eight things:

First, this silence does not exclude our feeling the pain of our afflictions

Psalm 39:10-11: [David] is sensible of his pain as well as of his sin; and having prayed off his sin in the former verses, he labors here to pray off his pain.

God allows his people to groan, though not to grumble.

Secondly, this silence does not exclude praying for the end of our afflictions

Thirdly, this silence does not exclude sorrow for our sin that led to the affliction, as well as efforts to crush that sin.

A holy, a prudent silence does not exclude men’s being kindly affected and afflicted with their sins, as the meritorious cause of all their sorrows and sufferings,

In all our sorrows we should read our sins! When God’s hand is upon our backs, our hands should be upon our sins.

Fourthly, such a silence does not exclude teaching others the lessons from our afflictions.

Fifthly, such a silence does not exclude some mourning and weeping

Sixthly, such a silence does not even exclude sighing and groaning

A man may sigh, and groan and roar under the hand of God, and yet be silent. It is not sighing—but muttering; it is not groaning—but grumbling; it is not roaring—but murmuring—which is opposite to a holy silence.

Sometimes the sighs and groans of a saint do in some manner, tell that which his tongue can in no manner utter.

Seventhly, such a silence does not exclude the use of means to end the affliction

We may neglect God as well by neglecting of means, as by trusting in means. It is best to use them, and in the use of them, to live above them.

Eighthly, and lastly, such a silence does not exclude speaking against those humans who have been the earthly cause of our afflictions.

III:  Why must Christians exercise this kind of silence under even the greatest afflictions and trials?

Eight Reasons:

Reason 1. That they may the better hear and understand the voice of the rod.

Reason 2. That they may . . . distinguish themselves from the men of the world, who usually fret and fling, mutter or murmur, curse and swagger, when they are under the afflicting hand of God.

Reason 3, that they may be conformable to Christ their head, who was dumb and silent under his sorest trials.

Reason 4. it is ten thousand times a greater judgment and affliction, to be given to a fretful spirit, a froward spirit, a muttering spirit under an affliction, then it is to be afflicted.

Reason 5: a holy, a prudent silence under afflictions, under miseries, doth best . . . fit the afflicted for the receipt of mercies.

Reason 6: it is fruitless . . . to strive, to contest or contend with God.

Reason 7: [these afflictions] shall cross and frustrate Satan’s great design and expectation.

Reason 8: That we may be like our forefathers in the faith who were patient and silent under such afflictions.

Last sentence in the book:

Thy life is but short, therefore thy troubles cannot be long; hold up and hold out quietly and patiently a little longer, and heaven shall make amends for all.

 

Cancer Cannot Separate Us from the Love of God in Christ Jesus

After preaching Sunday on Romans 8:35-39, I learned via Facebook that Anjel French has melanoma, an aggressive form of skin cancer that has spread to other parts of her body. Anjel is married to Jason French, former worship leader at one of the campuses of Bethlehem Baptist in Minneapolis and the author of some of the songs we sing at DGCC. In Jason’s post on Sunday evening, he discusses how the very truths we sang about and heard about that morning are life-giving and spirit-feeding in the midst of such serious trials. An excerpt:

Cancer is not God. It is created. It is creation. It is not self-existing. It is not autonomous. It does not have a will of its own such that it can live and move, expand or shrink, or even die apart from the will of the Creator of the entire Cosmos whom we are so privileged to call “Father,” because we have been adopted into his family through the life, death, burial, and resurrection of his beloved Son, Jesus, and are now sealed with the promise of and indwelt by the Holy Spirit.

So, cancer does not have the final say. Cancer must obey God. God has the final say and for his children, this will is always for us. It can never, ever be against us. If God commands the cancer to go, it will and must go. If God in Christ commands the cancer to remain, or grow, or shrink, or stay the same, it bends to the will of him who holds as things together—even cancer—by the word of his power. And if he wills the cancer stays, we know and believe he hides a smile behind the frowning providence, for he has written down all of our days in his book when as yet there were none of them (Psalm 139:14). Our days will not be cut short, nor prolonged. This is not fatalism. This is faith in our Father, Lord of heaven and earth.

Do pray for Anjel and Jason. And do read the whole post.

Manasseh, Trump, and Clinton

Which king of Israel or Judah had the longest reign?

Not David. Not Solomon. Neither Jehoshaphat nor Hezekiah.

The longest reigning king was Manasseh. He reigned for 55 years – the equivalent of 1961 until today. And yet he was a wicked, evil king:

Because Manasseh king of Judah has committed these abominations and has done things more evil than all that the Amorites did, who were before him, and has made Judah also to sin with his idols, therefore thus says the LORD, the God of Israel: . . .  I will wipe Jerusalem as one wipes a dish, wiping it and turning it upside down. And I will forsake the remnant of my heritage and give them into the hand of their enemies (from 2 Kings 21:11-14).

Why did God leave His people for such a long time under the authority of a bad man – such a bad man that, according to Jewish tradition, he had the prophet Isaiah sawn in two? Why did the people have to suffer? Why did God subject His people to injustice, to being led even further astray from Him?

The passage tells us. It is not only Manasseh who is evil. The people also are guilty. The king influences them, but they are responsible for “sin with his idols.” And so they must bear with an evil king for all these decades.

And make no mistake: God is the one who allows Manasseh to remain in power. For “the Most High rules the kingdom of men and gives it to whom he will” (Daniel 4:17, 25, 32).

God’s final judgment is yet to come, but is fully determined: He will send His people into exile. He will use the Babylonians to destroy the very temple dedicated to His Name. As 2 Kings 21 makes clear, Manasseh’s sins, and the sins of the people under him, lead to this horrible judgment of God (see especially Lamentations 2 for a description of some of the horrors).

But the judgment of God does not fall during Manasseh’s reign, nor during the reign of evil Amon, his son, nor during the reign of good Josiah, Manasseh’s grandson. Why the delay?

Perhaps in part because in his old age, near the end of his reign, Manasseh repents:

[The Assyrians] captured Manasseh with hooks and bound him with chains of bronze and brought him to Babylon.   And when he was in distress, he entreated the favor of the LORD his God and humbled himself greatly before the God of his fathers.  He prayed to him, and God was moved by his entreaty and heard his plea and brought him again to Jerusalem into his kingdom. Then Manasseh knew that the LORD was God.   (2 Chronicles 33:11-13)

As the Apostle Paul states in another context: “Note then the kindness and the severity of God” (Romans 11:22). Kindness and mercy toward one of the most evil of all the Judean kings; severity toward the rebellious people; kindness and mercy to their descendants, in bringing them back from exile.

We can continue the thought: Kindness and mercy to all those today from every tribe and tongue and nation who repent, who turn, who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and are saved; severity to those from every tribe and tongue and nation who continue in rebellion, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness (Romans 1:18), who reject their rightful King and only possible Savior.

Like the people of Judah, we the people of the United States do not deserve even a modicum of God’s mercy, and so we do not deserve an honest, good, principled leader of our government. At this point, it certainly does not look like we will get one this year. But if God could bring Manasseh to repentance, He can bring to repentance any American president; if God could destroy His own temple and bring down the kingdom called by His Name, He can bring down in judgment the United States of America; and if God could restore His people, showing mercy that they did not deserve, and raise up from a descendant of this very Manasseh the Savior of the world, then God can bring a sinful and rebellious nation today to repentance, and use it for His good and wise purposes to bring about the final culmination of His great  plan.

Father, in Your mercy, would you would grant such repentance?

Cry Out for Justice

Alton Sterling. And Brent Thompson. Philando Castile. And four as yet unnamed Dallas police officers.

We could go on: Thousands trafficked for sexual exploitation. About 2700 unborn babies killed yesterday in the US. In the absence of any effective government, warlords rape and pillage, leading millions to flee their homes in Syria, in Libya, in Congo. Meanwhile, even in this country, the powerful and well-connected get off scot free while the weak are punished to the full extent of the law.

We cry out with the prophet:

How long, LORD, must I cry for help? But you do not listen! I call out to you, “Violence!” But you do not intervene!  Why do you force me to witness injustice? Why do you put up with wrongdoing? Destruction and violence confront me; conflict is present and one must endure strife.  For this reason the law lacks power, and justice is never carried out. Indeed, the wicked intimidate the innocent. For this reason justice is perverted. (Habakkuk 1:2-4 NET)

Or, as a contemporary songwriter puts it:

“I believe you will come, Your justice be done – but how long? . . . How long? How long until this burden is lifted?”

We are right to cry out. We are right to weep. We are right to long for justice, indeed to work for justice.

But Scripture both challenges us and enables us to look at the horrors of this world from God’s perspective.

  • As we ask, “How long must we look at evil?” God asks, “How long will this people despise me?” (Numbers 14:11)
  • As we cry out, “Justice is perverted!” God asks, “How long will scoffers delight in their scoffing and fools hate knowledge?” (Proverbs 1:22)
  • As we long for God to act, He asks, “How long will you refuse to humble yourself before me?” (Exodus 10:3)

God challenges us to look within – to look at our own hearts, and to examine the hearts of our fellow countrymen. And when we look within, what do we see? Individually and as a nation: We have despised Him. We have mocked Him. We have rejected His revelation. We have arrogantly refused to humble ourselves before Him.

Scripture tells us that all the evil we see around us is the result of this human rebellion against God – a rebellion which we must admit, when we’re honest, is deeply ingrained within us. Indeed, all such evil is the logical consequence of that rebellion.

We can and should take palliative measures as a society that will lessen some of the suffering: Checks and balances in government; proper training for the police; equitable and efficient prosecution of criminals – both of the weak and the powerful; wise voting; holding up examples of honorable men and women. Furthermore, as individuals and as churches we can and must love and care for and assist the broken and hurting around us.

But suffering will continue. Injustice will endure. Violence will rear its head. The poor we will always have with us. Sin will thrive.

Until the Right Government takes over. That is, until the government is on Immanuel’s shoulders. Until God’s Kingdom comes, God’s will is done on earth as it is in heaven. Then His government and His peace will increase forever (Isaiah 9:6-7, Matthew 6:10).

After Habakkuk’s cry, God tells His prophet:

If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay. . . . The earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the LORD as the waters cover the sea. . . . The LORD is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him. (Habakkuk 2:3, 12, 20)

And the Apostle Paul assures us:

At the name of Jesus every knee will bow– in heaven and on earth and under the earth – and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father. (Philippians 2:10-11 NET)

So cry out. Weep with those who weep. Help the hurting. Work for justice.

And know: The Lord is indeed in His temple. He offers reconciliation to all rebels through the wiling sacrifice of His Son. He will bring about His Kingdom at exactly the right time. He is King.

 

Sowing in Tears

How do you respond to suffering?

During our recent trip to India, Karl Dauber and I taught several seminars on a biblical approach to suffering. Participants discussed this case study to help get at the issues:

Ravi came to faith in Jesus a year ago, after having a bad infection in his leg that was getting worse and worse. An evangelist came to his village, and was preaching the Gospel. Ravi, hearing him, mockingly asked, “Can your God heal my leg?” The evangelist replied, “Jesus Christ died and rose again so that you could become God’s child. If He can do that, He can certainly heal your leg.” He then prayed for Ravi – for healing, and for faith in Jesus. Nothing happened immediately – but the next morning, Ravi woke up and his leg was healed. He trusted Jesus, and began to meet with other Christians.

But since then his life has been tough. His parents disowned him and kicked him out of the house. Then, when Ravi began to speak the Gospel to his old friends, a group of them yelled at him, beat him, and drove him away. No one has come to faith through his witness. And now, the infection has returned. Other believers have prayed for healing, but nothing has happened.

Suppose you meet Ravi in his village, and he says, “Nothing good has happened since I started following Jesus. Even the initial healing seems to have gone away. I can’t witness effectively, I’ve been persecuted, I’ve lost my family, I’ve lost my home. What hope do I have? Why is God treating me this way?”

What would you say to Ravi?

Consider Psalm 126 in this context. The psalmist recalls a time when God worked in an amazing fashion to restore the Israelites after a period of defeat and failure – most likely, the return from Babylonian exile. He recalls the joy, the laughter, the amazement at what God had done:

Psalm 126:1-3 When the LORD restored the fortunes of Zion, we were like those who dream. Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, “The LORD has done great things for them.” The LORD has done great things for us; we are glad.

But now the nation once again is in the depths. Now once again all seems lost. Now that past restoration of fortunes seems long ago. So the psalmist cries out:

Psalm 126:4 Restore our fortunes, O LORD, like streams in the Negeb!

“You’ve done it in the past, Lord! You have shown yourself faithful when all seemed lost! Please, Lord, do it again! The streams in the Negeb disappear in the dry season, but roar again when the rains come. Restore our fortunes like that!”

In the midst of his cries, in the midst of his pain, the psalmist, reflecting on the character of God revealed in the past, states His confidence in God’s future grace. Using a farming image, he pictures his nation’s current state as planting seeds in the midst of sorrow:

Psalm 126:5-6 Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! He who goes out weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of joy, bringing his sheaves with him.

Note: They don’t wallow in their pain and do nothing. They are planting, even though they are hurting.

A farmer can make a thousand excuses for not planting:

  • The rains probably won’t come anyway.
  • Too much rain will fall and wash away the seed.
  • The seed probably is no good.
  • The insects likely will come and destroy the crop.
  • Raiders will come and steal the harvest.

So why go through with the hard work of preparing the field and planting? It seems like that hard work won’t yield any benefits anyway.

But the psalmist exhorts us: Put away the excuses. In your tears, sow. In your sorrow, step out in the work of the Lord. While you are hurting, minister to others. When God seems distant, act as if He seems close. And when you do so –  when you are faithful and trust in His faithfulness in the midst of pain – there will be a harvest. Indeed, there will be an abundant, joyful harvest. It may well look different from past harvests; it may well include pain as long as you are in this fallen world. But that sowing in tears will lead to reaping with shouts of joy. For God has promised.

So remember God’s promises. Ask for God’s grace to trust in those promises. And step out in faith to serve in your tears. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever” (Hebrews 13:8). Lift your eyes to Him – and in your serving, you will be blessed.

Love, Suffering, Obedience – and Resurrection

What is love?

There are a thousand answers to that question, since we use the word “love” in so many different ways. So let’s narrow the question down:

What is God’s love? And what does it look like when we love with God’s love?

In a recent book – A Loving Life: In a World of Broken Relationships – Paul Miller argues that this type of love is a one-way covenant; we step out in love without needing or even expecting a response. This makes us vulnerable, and often leads to suffering. We rightly cry out in lament over such suffering. But faith holds on to God’s covenant love in the midst of suffering, so that we continue to walk in obedience – we continue to love. In this we are following the path of Jesus’ life – love, suffering, death. But Jesus rose from the dead. And as God raised Jesus, He similarly will bring about a form of resurrection in us.

Miller masterfully brings out these truths from the book of Ruth, following Naomi, Ruth, and Boaz through their journeys of love, suffering, lament, obedience, and resurrection. Consider these selections – and may we follow the path of love.

Love and Covenant

[We learn through the storyline of Scripture that God’s love is a one-sided covenant, His determination to do good to His people, to redeem them, to make them His, despite their rebellion and disobedience. Thus, God’s love is also covenantal. Our love, if it is to be like God’s, must also be covenantal. The Hebrew word most often used of God’s love for His people is hesed. Paul Miller sometimes uses this word as an adjective to clarify that he is referring to that type of love.]

[There is a] modern myth that says, “Love is a feeling. If the feeling is gone, then love is gone.” Hollywood has no resources to endure in love when the feeling is gone. Actually, that’s the point when we are ready to learn how to love. 285

Ruth walks into the city ignored and, in effect, alone. One of the hardest parts of a hesed love is that you can love others, but there may be no one to love you. The very act of loving can make you lonely. . . .

But that loneliness, that dying, instead of being the end of you, can display Jesus’s beauty in you. The moment when you think everything has gone wrong is exactly the moment when the beauty of God is shining through you. True glory is almost always hidden—when you are enduring quietly with no cheering crowd. 809

The question is not “How do I feel about this relationship?” but “Have I been faithful to my word, to the covenants I am in?” As Jesus says in the Sermon on the Mount, “If you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?” (Matt. 5:46). In other words, if I love only when I feel like it, then I’ve really not understood love. 923

[After Ruth goes to Boaz’s field:] If you are bent on pursuing personal freedom, you remain frozen hunting for the perfect field, the perfect person. You never land. You have to commit to make love work. We don’t love in general. We love someone, somewhere. Setting our affections on someone always means narrowing down. Election and love are inseparable. This goes against the spirit of our age, which prizes independence and perfection. . . . Often our difficulties with love are simply that we react to the constriction that accompanies love. But that constriction is inherent in love. To love is to limit. . . .

Ironically, the experience of love, of narrowing your life, broadens and deepens your life. The narrower your life, the broader your soul. . . . Love always involves a narrowing of the life, a selecting of imperfection. 1072

Life is a path or pilgrimage. It is lived not in isolated moments, but in trajectories of reaping and sowing. Everything we do now creates the person we are becoming. We do not live in an impersonal, rigid world in which obedience mechanically dispenses reward; we live in our Father’s world, a richly textured world organized around invisible bonds that knit us together. All of life is covenant. 1319

[Consider covenant as a kind of limitation:] Repentance often drives the journey of love. It moves the story forward. Because Naomi returned home, God’s grace will be unleashed in her life. Repentance involves a returning to the box, to the world of limits, that my Father has given me. I stop creating my own story and submit to the story that God is weaving. . . .

Life is like a beautiful garden with a tree whose fruit I can’t touch. That “no” defines and shapes my life in the garden. So my relationship with my wife is like a wonderful garden with a solitary “no”: I cannot touch or develop emotional intimacy with another woman. That “no” narrows and limits my life. It provides a frame for my love to Jill. I am keenly aware that I can destroy a forty-year marriage in five minutes. That limiting, instead of boxing us in, lets the story come alive. 852

Love and Suffering

Suffering is the crucible for love. We don’t learn how to love anywhere else. Don’t misunderstand; suffering doesn’t create love, but it is a hothouse where love can emerge. Why is that? The great barrier to love is ego, the life of the self. In long-term suffering, if you don’t give in to self-pity, slowly, almost imperceptibly, self dies. This death of self offers ideal growing conditions for love. 221

Self-pity, [that is,] compassion turned inward, drives this downward spiral. Instead of reflecting on the wounds of Christ, I nurse my own wounds. Self-as-victim is the great narrative of our age. . . . Enshrining the victim is so seductive because you have been hurt. But self-pity is just another form of self-righteousness, and like all self-righteousness it isolates and elevates. It elevates you because it says you are better than the other person; you are the victim. It isolates you because you live in and are nourished by your interior world, which can’t be criticized. 1677

Suffering and Lament

[We often do our best to hide our suffering. Indeed, sometimes we confuse laments over suffering with lack of faith. But Paul Miller argues that Scripture is full of laments, and that lamentation is a necessary step on the path to hesed love.]

A lament puts us in an openly dependent position, where our brokenness reflects the brokenness of the world. It’s pure authenticity. Holding it in, not giving voice to the lament, can be a way of putting a good face on it. But to not lament puts God at arm’s length and has the potential of splitting us. We appear okay, but we are really brokenhearted. (emphasis added) 693

Listening to a lament is a powerful way of loving someone who is suffering. By being present, by not correcting or even offering our own unique brand of Christian encouragement (“It’s going to be all right – God’s in control”), we give those who are grieving space to be themselves.

This doesn’t mean that Naomi’s judgment of God is correct. God is good and just. He will answer her frustration with more goodness. Naomi was interpreting God through the lens of her experience.

She stopped in the middle of the story and measured God. A deeper faith waits until the end of the story and interprets experience through the lens of God’s faithfulness. Is this something we tell Naomi? No. It is what we tell ourselves. Good theology lets us endure quietly with someone else’s pain when all the pieces aren’t together. It acts like invisible faith-glue. 706

The opposite danger of not lamenting is over-lamenting. Dwelling on a lament is the breeding ground for bitterness. Bitterness is a wound nursed. Our culture’s emphasis on the sacredness of feelings often gives people an unspoken theology of bitterness. They feel entitled to it.727

Faith, Love and Obedience

[Difficult situations compel us to conclude:] You simply do not have the power or wisdom or ability in yourself to love. You know without a shadow of a doubt that you can’t love. That is the beginning of faith—knowing you can’t love. Faith is the power for love. 617

Unlike the Israelites who wanted to return to Egypt, Naomi is obeying, doing the right thing by returning to the Promised Land. Her feelings were all over the place, but she put one foot in front of the other as she returned. We can summarize her response this way:

Bitterness openly expressed to God + obedience  => a raw, pure form of faith

Bitterness openly expressed + disobedience => rebellion

Through a sheer act of will, Naomi continues to show up for life. In C.S. Lewis’s Screwtape Letters, the senior devil, Screwtape, warns his junior devil of the danger of this obedience.

Do not be deceived, Wormwood. Our cause [the Devil’s cause] is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending to do our Enemy’s will [God’s will], looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys. 747

Ruth’s act of loving put her at the bottom of society, but she doesn’t push back on her lowered status. She accepts the cost of love. Like Jesus, she takes the lower place. Love and humility are inseparable.

When serving is combined with humility, the serving becomes almost pleasurable. You are thankful for any gift given you. In contrast, pride can’t bear the weight of unequal love. . . . ride makes others’ joy, or even the possibility of our own joy, feel phony. It is an odd sort of authenticity where we demand that others be as depressed as we are. 1393

Jealousy is extraordinarily deceptive. It is by far the most destructive sin in communities and organizations that I’ve been a part of, and yet, I seldom hear it mentioned or confessed. It always masks itself as something else, creating a hidden chain of slander that drags someone down. A multiheaded hydra, it begins with an inability to rejoice with another’s success, leaks out as gossip, and finally erupts as slander. Jealousy seeks to gain by destroying others, while hesed  [love] loses by giving itself. One is the heart of evil. The other is pure gospel.  1494

Many Christians get stuck trying to grow their faith by growing their faith. They try to get closer to Jesus by getting closer to Jesus. Practically, that means they combine spiritual disciplines (the Word and prayer) with reflection on the love of God for them. But that will only get you so far. In fact it often leads to spiritual moodiness where you are constantly taking your pulse wondering how much you know the love of God for you. Or you go on an endless idol hunt trying to uncover ever deeper layers of sin. Oddly enough, this can lead to a concentration on the self, a kind of spiritual narcissism. Ruth discovers God and his blessing as she obeys, as she submits to the life circumstances that God has given her. So instead of running from the really hard thing in your life, embrace it as a gift from God to draw you into his life. 2095

Obedience and Resurrection

[Miller discusses how the life of loving obedience often follows the shape of a J-curve: Our love and obedience leads to suffering, and so our life seems to get worse. But God brings about the upward slope of the “J” – in ways that we cannot know ahead of time, following trajectories that we never expected.]

[God teaches] us to love by overloading our systems so we are forced to cry for grace. God permits our lives to become overwhelming, putting us on the downward slope of the J-curve so we come to the end of ourselves. I encouraged my friend to embrace the downward path, not to push against it or worry about where his feelings were with his wife. Jesus said, “The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. . . . No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord” (John 10:11, 18). Seeing the gospel as a journey remaps our stories by embedding them in the larger story of Jesus’s death and resurrection. His normal becomes our normal. 1004

Here’s what I have learned going through the J-curve:
1. We don’t know how or when resurrection will come. It is God’s work, not ours.
2. We don’t even know what a resurrection will look like. We can’t demand the shape or timing of a resurrection.
3. Like Jesus, we must embrace the death that the Father has put in front of us. The path to resurrection is through dying, not fighting.
4. If we endure, resurrection always comes. God is alive! 1021

We can do death. But we can’t do resurrection. We can’t demand resurrection—we wait for it. 1032

 May we love, suffer, lament, believe, obey – and see resurrection!

[Paul Miller, A Loving Life: In a World of Broken Relationships (Crossway, 2014). Numbers after the quotations are Kindle locations.]